Dude. I love being a mom.
But parenting SUCKS!!!
Being all "take out the teash" "clean your room" "eat your veggies" "go take a shower again, I still see dirt" blah blah blah over and over again is so ridiculous. And my herd would tell you that listening to me saying these things is enough to drive them insane.
So I throw in a lot of "I love you" "you are so amazing" "I cant believe you are my kid, how did I get so lucky?" I try to balance the positive and negative. Because kids need negative. They need to be taught wright from wrong. And some times my actions aren't enough. So you say it. And they need positive, because if all they hear is negative, they turn into tiny angry people.
But then those little kids; that are so funny, cute, loveable, smell so good, make you so proud, turn into teenagers.
Kill me now.
Teenagers suck on a whole new level. (if you aren't parenting a teenager, just stop reading. Because you have NO idea what that tiny baby will one day turn in to. And I have enough judgement from the one teen and one preteen in my house to last a life time, so just stop reading) No matter the discipline, they think you hate them. No matter the love, they think you hate them.
No ammount of praise, love or worship is going to make up for that time you said "dude, what are you doing?" "hey! Knock it off" "go to our room" "be nice" "how dare you punch your sister" "turn in your homework for the love of all things holy!!!" Nope, they still hate you. And they think you hate them. They walk around like they own the world. Dude, I have to remind you to brush your teeth. You dont own crap.
But, you are their parent. And you love them more than you like the pair of jeans that makes your butt look good. Or dads....more than coming in under par against your biggest competion at work.
You love their smelly asses. Even if they dont know it. But, I tell ya....being a parent really sucks some times. The looks of pure hate coming from their eyes. Makes your heart sink and you start to fear for your life. If they only knew, that I would die for you. If you only knew, I would kill anyone that hurt you. If you only knew, I will stand by your side through anything. If you only knew, my world only revolves because of you. If you only knew, I havent had new shoes or jeans in two years because I buy you everything you need and then some of what you want before anything for me. If you only knew, that my heart implodes every time you look at me with such hate. If you only knew, that I pray to God at night for help so you love me. If you only knew, I cry myself to sleep some nights after we fight. If you only knew, how much I love you. Maybe you would love me too.
